I might have been off-topic, if I had one

Well, I have been giving the topic of the blog a lot of thought lately and for the most part I came up with nothing. I have been drier than… oh man, I can’t even come up with a comparison. The one thing that does come to mind actually ties into a conversation I had yesterday with an attractive woman (read this as my version of kryptonite). I was the topic of discussion (She just couldn’t get enough of me, yeah, I don’t think so , seriously, she's happily married so I was just joking) and I made a confession that I seldom do. The statement was that I don’t necessarily like myself. I do accept myself and I understand the reasoning behind my actions but some improvement needs to take place before I can say that I actually like myself.

I think this stems again in part from that afore-mentioned need to please from an earlier entry. I have a bit of a fear of disappointing someone close to me, therefore I make it very difficult for someone TO get close to me. I think this also tends to attract me to women who would rather have their armpit hair removed with pliers than spend an evening out with me. The ones that are okay with it inevitably end up seeing me as the big brother they never had. Again, I feel that I have a certain lack of connection with humanity because I just can’t figure out why there are guys out there in relationships who fool around on their supposed "girlfriends" or the women will accept a guy that gets tanked and smacks them around or generally just don't give a damn for the person they are with. I realize that not everyone is the same so a single line of logic can’t be generally applied to all circumstances but at the same time, I don’t like mysteries I can’t figure out.

Maybe a previous commenter had the right idea. Maybe I am overanalyzing things and I just need to get laid. ;)